Things of Dreams, of Hopes

Things of dreams, of hopes,

This life I live and all that I have,

The promise of America, a ghost long dead.

Stripped of humanity, stripped of dignity, I see the pain in her eyes;

Mine tear for her, for the psychopath she has become,

She hates her children, punishing them for their ignorance.

But who is to blame, we’ve offered our souls to the Devil with each election,

Perpetuating our own destruction, more of the same does not breed change.

Perhaps I am guilty as any choosing to write as my protest.

Is my hope to inspire sufficient?

Only time will tell.

 

~~ Dominic R. DiFrancesco ~~

 

Advertisements

9 thoughts on “Things of Dreams, of Hopes

  1. Nice one here too but you might want to look at that phrase: ‘Mine tear’… I think that perhaps ‘My tear’ might work better there.
    I think the line with ‘Stripped of humanity…’ looks like a good place to start a new stanza, depending on what poetic style you have in mind. If you decide that this should be a uni-stanzad verse, then no trouble… Still, I think the stanza there will make some sense.
    Is it possible to put a question mark after the ‘but who is to blame'(?) Looks like it is needed.
    Then, if you can break that line there so that it starts a new line and perhaps, new stanza, it will flow well.

    Furthermore, I think that instead of ‘We’ve offered ourselves… with each election’, we should try ‘We offer ourselves…with each election’. The tenses and agreement of verb with subject match more. It also shows that we are talking of a continuous thing because it is a continuing process where we [standing for Americans] keep offering themselves instead of making it look like something that has stopped (as inferred by using the perfect past participle, ‘offered’).

    In all, interesting poem. It shows a heart sickened by a disease that he is affected/infected with. Still, time will tell. There’s a certain poem I read, ‘Freetown’ by Syl Cheney Coker. In the poem, the poetic persona speaks about the evils of his country that he hates, and then notes ironically ‘I myself am one of them’. Something similar to your question of culpability there.
    Well done Sir. I love reading your poems and the consistency with which you drop them…wow… It is almost as if your heart beats in measures of verse.
    Well done.

      • Thank you, for every poetic piece… Somehow I find myself looking forward to each even when I don’t comment on all, I get to read them. The way you play with style and form, weaving lines around many themes… It isn’t always one finds such on blogs where a lot is taken for granted (I am guilty too!)…
        We await far more and with all the expertise you’ve shown, expect quite much!
        Well done Sir.

  2. This is perfect Dom… Your “hope to inspire IS sufficient”… as I linger in your words… Inspired…
    Hope your weekend is most inspirational…
    Michael

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s